Kelly (over the phone): "So, the little fridge stopped working for some reason. I came in this morning and there was water all over the floor and I had to throw the milk out."
Me: "Suck." Secretly hoping it wasn't my fault. Later, at the coffee shop.
Kelly: "We need to make sure we put all the milk in the back fridge at night. Thankfully we use it up pretty fast, so we can store some in the little fridge while we work."
Me (leaning into fridge): "Uh-huh." Still hoping it wasn't my fault as I examine suspicious puncture wound. Crap. "So, there is a chance this is my fault."
Kelly: "What do you mean?"
Me: "I was chipping off ice with a screwdriver in preparation for defrosting, and I may have accidentally punctured a hole in the fridge. I'm not saying 100% but that could have broken the fridge."
Kelly: "You're fired."
Me: "Well, now we can get a new one. This is how I get new things."
I told a customer this story later and they thought it was a pretty clever strategy. I even mimicked telling Chase to straighten out because I could always stab him with a screwdriver and get a new husband. They laughed, but I was completely serious. Although that could have been the freon talking. Meanwhile, we got a beautiful new fridge from Costco.
Here is a comic Kelly drew to commemorate the death of the old fridge:
Oh, those toilet bowls? Apparently I infected the ENTIRE peninsula with the norovirus (allegedly) resulting in several people (including myself) spending lots of quality time in the bathroom.
Okay, this isnt a real post; it's a "I-am-so-excited-and-I-know-you-are-too-just-be-patient" post. My book is in the editing phase right now and I am eagerly awaiting Kelly's delivery of it into my waiting hands. So I can then hand it off to my next beta reader. Hopefully, they will enjoy reading my book the same way I do:
With lots and lots of wine. This only enhances the experience.
Total editing count (including myself): 2
Total editors left (including my husband who I swear I will hound until the bitter end until he is finished even if it means he has to stay up until 2am): 2
Until my next update, here is an adorable picture of my son eating a tomato:
I like to read books in combination. Specifically, 2-3 books in series that deal with a common theme such as 1984and Brave New World (frightening alternate futures) or Ann Benson's plague series starting with The Plague Talesand Year of Wonders(the plague, obviously). I'm not sure why 100%, but once I find an interesting tale, I like to stick with it and discover other authors' perspective on the same theme. I would like to recommend a few reading combos, if I may, during the life of this blog in keeping with my theme of sharing a love of reading.
For your reading pleasure, I would like to recommend reading the combination of Elizabeth Kostova's The Historian and Bram Stoker's Dracula. Both obviously deal with vampires, but it's so much more than that! Let's discuss.
The Historian is an interwoven story told from the perspective of three generations of scholars beginning in the 1930s (or thereabouts): Professor Rossi, his student Paul (1950s) and Paul's daughter in 1972. All of their adventures begin with the discovery of an ancient and mysterious leather bound book full of empty pages except for a wood cutting of a dragon in the middle.The book prompts Rossi to research clues and track the movements of Vlad the Impaler, and leads him to a terrifying conclusion, which he shares with Paul twenty years later: Dracula still lives and walks among us. After confessing this, Rossi disappears, and Paul, along with Rossi's unacknowledged daughter, Helen, race to not only destroy the monster, but to save his mentor and friend. Another twenty years later, their daughter finds Paul's book and aged, yellow letters, and he reluctantly begins to tell her his harrowing story. Full of marvelous history and tantalizing clues, The Historian is a gripping mystery that will leave you white-knuckled until the riveting conclusion. Wonderful and moving character development make this a book you will want to discover over and over.
Most of us are familiar with the story of Dracula, but Bram Stoker's classic is more than just a portrayal of a monster. When Jonathan Harker travels to Transylvania, he is struck by the eccentric Count Dracula, and begins to fear that not all is as is seems in the gloomy castle. As the Count leaves for England, Jonathan becomes a prisoner, and strange occurrences plague London, from a ghost ship to puncture marks on a young woman's neck. Pieced together from diary entries and newspaper clippings, Dracula follows the lives of London residents Jonathan Harker, Mina Harker (nee Murray), Dr. Jack Steward, their friends Quincy and Arthur, and Dr. Abraham Van Helsing as they use their brains to stop an evil fiend from draining England dry. It is a study of determination, love, friendship, and the human will magnificently crafted through thoughts, feelings, and atmosphere. A classic that doesn't rely on gore to be frightening, or sex to be loving. An entertaining read that will keep you turning the pages.
Now go dig in and read! Hope you enjoy this combo as much as I did!
A few days ago I completed my second book (pauses for applause) and while I'm sitting here trying not to die from anticipation waiting for my proof to get here, I thought I would pass on some wisdom. One reason I am very excited about publishing, despite seeing my name in print, is that I've found that I have become an inspiration to others to do the same. With this in mind, I would like to sketch out some tips to help anyone out there wishing to publish but maybe you were too afraid or didn't know where to start.
This is for those of you writing books for yourself that have been gathering dust for the last fifteen years until your significant other asks you the question, "Are you ever going to do anything with that?"
"Yes, murtherfurker," you can say, "I am!"
Here are the diamonds, or steps if you will. I chose twelve for the snappy post title.
1. Have an idea.
Even if you think it sucks, which it just might. You can't get started without an idea, so have one and work it through. You can always toss it if it doesn't speak to you in the end, but you never know until you try. Some of my best characters/ideas started out minor and developed into story lines I am very proud of. Just go with it. 2. Get motivated.
Probably the hardest, but you have to set time aside for yourself even if you only write a few lines. Having a finished product really helped motivate me to write the next book, so if you have something you're really proud of, draw on that feeling. 3. Find your happy place.
Don't be gross. Besides, if you haven't found that by now, writing isn't your biggest issue. Anyway, my recommendation is a creative tower of awesomeness, but if you're like me and you don't have one, find a nice spot at home dedicated to writing where there are no kids, spouses, dogs, pirates, or whatever to get in your way of creativity. Which brings me to step four. 4. Eliminate distractions. As a wife and mother of two small children, I know how difficult this step is, but trust me you too can find a quiet moment to think! Tell hubby/wifey to watch the kiddos or go to a coffee shop by yourself where you don't have to listen to whining or look at the floor you need to vaccuum. All of life's messes will still be there after writing time is over. 5. Outline your idea.
Before I've written one word, I know my main characters, their personalities, the main plot, the beginning, middle, and end of my story. Then I just fill in the rest. You can't start a journey without knowing the destination, right? That's not to say the unpredictable doesn't happen, but it's nice to have a map. I like to know certain plot points to keep the story flowing. Remember, though, that some of the best ideas are unpredictable. Don't worry about straying off course a little. Like art, there are no mistakes in writing. Well, maybe a few. Twilight comes to mind, but that's what editors are for. 6. Write. Just go for it! Don't worry about editing and write until your fingers bleed. 7. Keep writing. Life happens, but don't forget to come back to your story. If you're on a roll, don't stop. This may mean you're up until midnight, but trust me it's worth the lack of sleep. I would rather be tired than lose out on a good idea. 8. Don't stop reading. Annie Proulx, the author of Brokeback Mountain, said, "Writing comes from reading, and reading is the finest teacher of how to write." For me, I found this to be very true. I tried setting everything aside, including reading, on order to concentrate on writing, but I found myself blocked. Once I picked up a book again, the words flowed on paper. Get inspired. 9. Finish, then edit.
Margaret Atwood wrote, "You must see the writing as emerging like a long scroll of ink from the index finger of your right hand; you must see your left hand erasing it." I love this philosophy because it allows you to write without restraint. Don't worry about grammer, word choice, or even elaboration on parts of your story already written. Just write. Get your ideas on paper, then go back after you've written 'the end' and edit and add. 10. Self-publish.
I use CreateSpace.com because it is free and user friendly. Again, you can't reach people unless you get your words out there. Don't worry about sending manuscripts to publishers or spending hundreds of dollars to get your book published. Self-publishing is easy and you reach readers fast. If you are successful enough, the traditional publishers will find you. Be your biggest advocate. 11. Proof. Get outside opinions. After you self-publish, before you make your book available to the public, order a proof. Check for errors and find places needing work or where you wish to elaborate details. Lend this copy to friends for them to give feedback. Your book is your baby, and you may not see the errors like an outside source. Ask for honest opinions and constructive criticism; you want your book to be the best it can be. Hopefully, you can remain friends afterwards. 12. Don't be afraid to fail.
Afraid of failure? Afraid people will not respond to your writing like you'd hope? It's called taking a chance. Maybe you wont be well received as you expected, but it's better than not knowing and living with regret. Who knows, maybe you'll be the next Hemingway or Tolkien. What if J.K. Rowling never decided to publish the stories she told her children? What if Fitzgerald thought The Great Gatsby was a terrible idea? If these authors scrapped their works and never took a chance, we would be deprived without them. And they would live forever thinking they were failures. You may fail, but at least you took a chance and jumped out of the airplane. If nothing else, you can enjoy the ride.
I hope these steps inspire you to take a chance on writing and maybe even publishing. There is an abundance of wonderful authors out there, and we are living in such an amazing time where their work is available to us readers. We are out there, and we want to support your efforts, read your book, and share your journey.
Now, open a bottle of wine, and get on it!
Leading up to this most momentous occasion, I have been taking stock of my life for the past thirty years. Not all of my memories are pleasant; in fact many I would wish to forget. They say our hardships make us what we are today. I have been remade again and again.
Bear with me here; I may get a little veklempt.
My life has been anything but easy. Where many of my friends grew up in normal, loving households, my family life was a perfect lesson in disfunction. My mother married my father at the age of 19 and by the age of 20, my brother was born and she knew she had made a mistake. Several years and two more kids later, my parents fought constantly. I was lucky to have a supportive and attentive mother, but my father was a relative stranger. The idea of children was exciting, but once we outgrew our baby cuteness, my father lost interest and spent very little if any time with us at all. I can recall one instance where I sat in the same room with him for hours and was never once acknowledged. At the age of 8, my parents divorced, and it was the best thing to ever happen to our family. I cannot imagine how I would have turned out had I grown up with such a cold, distant man. My resentment toward him escalated as I got older, having to endure guilt trips and pity parties, settling adult problems on the shoulders of a child. My maturity quickly outstripped his until I could no longer stand to be in his presence. Our visits dwindled; we spoke rarely on the phone. The last time I saw my father was when I graduated high school where he acted more like a child than I did. The last time I spoke to him was when I told him I was accepted to WSU. He told me I had better get scholarships because he couldn't afford to send me there. He never once congratulated me. Five years later, I struggled with the choice of whether or not to invite him to my wedding. In the end, I extended the olive branch, mostly to avoid guilt trips from my grandmother. It was now or never; his last chance to make-up for all the neglect and bullshit. He declined to attend. I haven't cared to think about him since. He will never meet his grandchildren.
Adolescence is difficult for all of us, and I would never presume to say I had it worse than anyone else. I struggled with my identity, my place in the world. I never felt like I fit in; I wasn't girly or popular or talented in any way. My self esteem was non-existent, and at home the nightmares continued. I don't wish to recall every detail, but by the time I reached junior high, we had endured enough for a lifetime.
I was lucky. At a point in my life where I could have spiraled into oblivion, I made the most amazing, wonderful friends. I cannot thank them enough for accepting me, even though I was REALLY weird. And chubby :) Thank you all so much for the laughter, the crazy sleepovers, flashlight tag, "True Colors," green M&Ms, Mud (especially Mud), Monty Python, and all the other goofy inside jokes I will think about over the years and smile...when I remember...old age and all. I feel so incredibly privileged to know you. I couldn't have made it without you.
I was smart. I wasn't pretty or skinny. I didn't have beautiful hair or wear make-up. I didn't have boyfriends or even dates. The only thing I had was a brain, and it was my pride and joy. I am so thankful to have a love of learning, even if it earned me the title of "nerd." I may be a nerd, but I am also the nerd that now owns her own business and writes books. Suck it. I am so thankful for wonderful teachers who challenged me and nourished my brain. It is okay to like school, and I am looking forward to going back.
I was an artist. And not too bad. I suppose every artist is most critical of themselves, but there are moments when I feel pride in a job well done. Being an artist has allowed me not only to express myself creatively, but to find joy in making others happy. I am so grateful for the tears of joy I have invoked with this gift.
High school was awkward as it is for everyone, but thanks to great friends, great teachers, and great classes, I am happy to be able to look back on my high school experience. No, I never went to a dance or had boyfriends, but in all honesty I didn't mind. More important than the social scenes were my best friends and the fun we had. No dance could compete. And of course, I had Jane Austen. When I discovered her books, it was an epiphany, lightning striking, a light bulb going off, that moment in time where you know your life will be forever changed. Dramatic much? Perhaps, but because of her, I decided to write. I had always considered myself imaginative; I drew, I wrote little stories for school, I did a lot of pretend play. And then Jane Austen came along and I discovered my muse, my genre. And the words came. I began writing The Devoted, then titled The Disinterested Intellect, and another piece of the puzzle fell into place. My journey to becoming a writer had begun.
Being accepted to WSU was the most exciting day of my life (up until that point). Ever since I was eight, I wanted to be a veterinarian. I loved animals, and I couldn't imagine wanting to be anything else. I planned on majoring in Zoology, pre-vet. I loved Pullman. The campus is beautiful, the classes were challenging, and the people were friendly. All the high school b.s. was over; we were adults. I admit; I loved my classes. For the most part. Some were incredibly difficult. I still didn't like chemistry, I hated physics, and physiology was my biggest struggle. I excelled in biology, mammology, and anatomy, and I ended up with a minor in history. It was at WSU that I met Chase. My friend was dating his best friend, so our meeting was inevitable. And we hated each other. He thought I was a cold bitch, which was probably because I was looking at him thinking, "Who is this arrogant bastard who won't shut up?" My own Pride and Prejudice beginning. Obviously, we got over the initial impression, and here we are 10 years later. It was also in college that I was introduced to my love of horses. Its true what they say: you discover yourself in college.
In the end, I decided to forgo vet school. Why? I had changed. I still loved animals, but I focused more on wildlife rehab. And I was broke. And tired. I had been studying for 17 years and I needed a break. I graduated in 2005 with my Bachelor's in Zoology and Chase with his Master's in Entomology. We moved to Long Beach, WA when he accepted a job at the WSU extension office. I worked for Skippers Horse Rentals. In 2006, I accepted a job at Long Beach Coffee Roasters, and that summer, Chase and I were married. The rest is history, right?
Here I am, a husband, two kids, a business, a book, a life later. This has been quite a journey, and I would like to thank everyone who rode it out with me. Thank you, Mom, for believing in me, for knowing there was more than met the eye. Thank you to my lifelong friends for letting me find a place in your group. Thank you Chase for seeing me underneath the awkward, shy, chubby girl. Thank you, Kelly, for being my best friend, for gallops on the beach, for beer and rants. Thank you coffee shop for introducing me to some awesome people. Thank you to everyone who encourages me to write, to paint, to be me. Thank you to my beautiful children for teaching me patience and that I have an amazing capacity to love. I look forward to the next 30 years with you.
This has been a long diatribe and it probably seems a little sanguine, but I have been reflecting on my life a lot lately. I have looked back at where I was, and I could have never imagined this is where I would be. Through it all, I have been myself, though ever changing, at the core I have been a geek, an artist, a loyal friend, freaking hilarious, and stubbornly strong. Sinatra said it best: I did it my way.
Okay we all know I am completely out of the loop when it comes to internet information exchange. This blog and Facebook probably represents the scope of my knowledge. So of course I had no idea what a "vlog" was. But I do know what Fanfiction is and after reading some related to Pride and Prejudice, I was alerted by one of the authors to something called "The Lizzie Bennet Diaries" on YouTube. (FYI: If you're into Fanfiction and you don't already know, fanfiction.net had a huge archive that is categorized very well. Don't know what Fanfiction is? Well, that's just sad). I hopped over to YouTube to check it out since I am so obviously obsessed with all things Jane Austen especially Pride and Prejudice and I realized two things:
1) I am way out of touch. I just figured out the whole blog thing and now there's video blogging? I think I'm going to go back to my parchment, quill pen, and sealing wax for a moment and absorb this information.
2) I frickin' LOVE "The Lizzie Bennet Diaries"!
Here's what's it's all about:
Lizzie Bennet is a grad student filming a video blog (or "vlog" as I've come to discover) about her family and life. She has an older sister, Jane, who is perfect and wonderful and a younger sister, Lydia, who is kinda whore-y yet endearing. Her mother is obsessed with finding all three husbands. Yes, this is a modern Pride and Prejudice with a twist.
And its hilarious!
Seriously, even people who have never read the book love the vlog, but if you have read Pride and Prejudice, you have a whole different appreciation for this updated version. Lizzie is smart, goofy, and of course pretty judgemental, but she's Elizabeth Bennet and she's awesome. Her best friend Charlotte Lu edits the vlog and is supportive and spunky. And of course you can't have this classic tale without Bing Lee (AKA Charles Bingley) and William Darcy (I'm pretty sure you can figure out who that is). Right now its episode 50-something and I can't wait for the next installment. It follows along with the book for the most part, but what's refreshing is that "The Lizzie Bennet Diaries" is its own interpretation and not just another adaptation. The producers make the characters and story their own while still keeping with the spirit of the original. Here's a sample of a few of my favorite episodes just to whet your appetite:
THE BIG MEETING!!!
Ah, Darcy, you ridiculous snob, you.
THE TURNING POINT
One of my favorite scenes in the book, too.
MRS. BENNET'S CONVOLUTED PLAN
Gotta love Mrs. Bennet and her desperation to marry off her daughters.
You know you want to see more...So go and check it out!
Oh, and I finished reading Steig Larsson's Millenium series and it was awesome! Go read them. Sorry for being so bossy.
P.S. Sorry about the whole "you're sad if you don't know what Fanfiction is." Actually, it probably is just a testament to the fact that I don't get out much. Good for you!
P.P.S. Yes, I am working on my next book whenever I have a spare moment. I have even set aside other projects (i.e. horseshoes and reading top 150 books) in order to devote my full attention to it! Please don't forget to like my Facebook page to keep up to date with progress and just plain talk about books!
OK, I admit I was somewhat hesitant to read Fifty Shades of Grey and I'll explain why. So, I am not a prude by any stretch of the imagination. I've read my share of naughty fiction, nothing over the top, but descriptions of sex in a book does not bother me by any means. However, I have my limits. I don't like to read about painful sex, abusive sex, etc etc...basically nothing I wouldn't do myself. When I first heard about Mr. Fifty Shades, the gist I got was that it was about a very intense, controlling man who likes it really rough and is into BDSM. Not my thing, personally. So, even though a lot of people I knew were reading the series, I couldn't get around the concept that this was about some jerk beating up women to get his rocks off. Finally, I was told that yes the writing was not wonderful, but the story was very hot and it was a great book purely from an entertainment standpoint and that it might be a good gift suggestion for Chase to get me. And one day he did. And it sat on my shelf while I read some top 100 rec's until one day I found my curiosity getting the better of me. One day and a little over 500 pages later, I had to admit the truth: I was consumed. SPOILER AND HOTTNESS ALERT!
All three books are written from the point of view of Anastasia Steele, a 21 year-old WSU-Vancouver student majoring in English who is more comfortable with Austen, Bronte, and Hardy than men as she is somewhat awkward and shy, but she is also stubborn, courageous, and outspoken. Sound familiar? Honestly, she is one of the main reasons I was immediately drawn into reading the first book, Fifty Shades of Grey; I find her so relate able. Her best friend and roommate, Kate, is a journalist who is supposed to be traveling to Seattle to interview a multi-gagillion dollar mogul for the school paper, but she's unfortunately sick :( So, of course her beloved and oh-so-wonderful friend Ana will go for her and record the interview. And Kate will owe her big time.
So off Ana goes to interview this guy who she already doesn't think too highly of because he's supposed to be arrogant and he's crazy rich which does not impress her and she's nervous as hell she'll screw up the interview. She's not too worried that he's supposed to be amazingly handsome because honestly she hasn't met a guy yet that has turned her head. She's too busy reading to notice. Then she literally falls into his office and meets Christian Grey. Yes, it sounds cliche, but her life is never the same.
Christian Grey is used to getting his way, and he wants Anastastia Steele. Not as a girlfriend; as a submissive. Yes, Mr. Grey is a Dominant with a room full of whips, handcuffs, toys, and all manner of playthings sure to make sex memorable. For innocent virgin Ana, this is beyond complicated. Can she sign on to be a submissive when her personality is anything but?
Here's why the BDSM angle didn't really bother me: it was so technical. There's a contract and everything. With hard limits and rules and amendments. Maybe my scientific mind approved of the way everything was drawn up to protect both parties. And he was open to negotiations to discuss the terms of the contract if she agreed. Safety was the number one concern, and nothing was forced. This was an agreement between two consenting adults for the purpose of pleasure. No big deal folks.
As far as Mr Grey himself, yes he pissed me off. A lot. He's controlling and emotionally retarded because of a really awful past. But Ana doesn't put up with the BS like so many others. She challenges him and sees into his heart. She decides not to sign on until after a trial period. As they grow closer, Ana fears that she won't be enough to slake his appetite. She also asserts that she wants more: she wants a relationship. At the close of the first book, and after lots of naughty romping that leaves you panting and fanning yourself, she makes a daring decision to push herself to the limit of what a Dom/Sub relationship might entail. She tells Christian to show her the worst punishment she could receive to see if she could handle it. In that moment, she realizes she can't enter into this kind of arrangement; she can't give him what he wants. And she fears that he can't give her what she wants: love. So, she leaves.
End book one. And another two days, two books, and over 1000 pages later, I have finished the series. Yes, they read that fast, and no you can't put them down.
I could go on and on about plot lines for Fifty Shades Darker and Fifty Shades Freed, but I'm hot and bothered enough as it is ;) What one really needs to understand is that this isn't just a series about two people having lots of hot sex. There is a deeper emotional undercurrent dealing with issues of trust, love, acceptance, and self-worth. Both characters evolve throughout the series and you just can't help but enjoy their story. Even control freak Christian. He actually can be rather adorable I admit. And oh so hot.
Seriously, don't even bother buying just the first book because you won't rest until you read the whole series. No, they aren't up for any awards in literature, but they are sure to entertain. None of the sex made me in the least squeamish personally. Well, maybe once or twice, but I got over it.
I am not ashamed to admit it: I am a Grey fan. Just thinking about him makes me giggle a little bit and bite my lip. Which he loves FYI.
And I will be reading these books again. *fans self*
and 
and 
(the plague, obviously). I'm not sure why 100%, but once I find an interesting tale, I like to stick with it and discover other authors' perspective on the same theme. I would like to recommend a few reading combos, if I may, during the life of this blog in keeping with my theme of sharing a love of reading.
